28 lessons I’ve learned in 28 years
- Larry Githaiga
- Jan 30, 2020
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 22, 2024
A Compilation of Shower Epiphanies
Photo by Caterina Berger on Unsplash
28 Years. What a ride! The earth has done that many revolutions with me in it.
Time flows like water between my fingers. Clutching it tighter only seems to make it move faster. And yet, here I am, blessed with the faint knowledge that the next step may be my last and cursed with the cognition of my mortality.
Well then, here is another listicle. It was born in the shower, matured in a journal and expects to live out its retirement here. It is a mix of random thoughts and advice I have given myself over the years.
I chronicle it here, not as a gem of wisdom, but as ore, hopefully from which a speck of gold can be found.
Love selflessly, It is the greatest gift you can give. If you choose to care, give it your all. Not everything ends well, and that’s ok. Love all the same.
Be kind. Not necessarily nice, but kind. A little kindness makes the world go round. It also comes around. Pass it on.
Don’t hold back. Life is too short to live small. It’s easy to hold back, to make yourself average to fit in. I say don’t. Go all out. Own your weirdness. the world is too full of average.
Have a support structure — as a man. Talk about pain It’s too easy to feel like no-one knows what you’re dealing with. Men are especially guilty of this. I am guilty of this. Find a friend, someone to talk to or vent to. It helps. Build a structure you can lean on.
Call your parents, they’re not going to be around forever The older I get, the more cognizant I am of my own mortality. I try and imagine what it must be like for my parents. Someday they won’t be there, so call them.
Travel, and not for work. Business travel. UGH! Do something fun, see the world — Start with your backyard. There’s so much to see that is not bound between hotel and office.
Try something new, I don’t care what Always be learning. Stretch that muscle, pick up an instrument, go to the gym, learn to dance. Expand your repertoire. It’s amazing how easy it is to redefine yourself in a few years. Maybe you can even start writing listicles on Medium
Learn to ask for help, and even better, advice I have always been terrible at asking for help. The independent streak in me feels like it is a betrayal to all that I hold dear. This is something I’ve had to learn.
Some opportunities find you, take them. Sometimes, the road you walk has trees that bear fruit. Enjoy them
Some opportunities don’t find you, seek them. Other times, you have to go off the beaten path to find your destiny. Do it.
Find a hobby, something to unwind Need I explain this? Find your zen you wannabe Buddhist monk!
Find a community, a place you can belong. Humanity is social. The only problem is finding people who accept you for who you are, weirdness and all. So look for them, they are out there, somewhere.
If it doesn’t frighten you, up the ante. If what you do doesn’t get your adrenaline pumping, perhaps it’s time to get more ambitious. Take a little risk.
It’s okay to have bad days Sh** happens. And it’s okay to take a time-out. Being sad and angry is a natural human condition. Take some time, heal, find yourself.
Stand up for yourself, not just to others, but to yourself I try to have a definite set of principles to live by. And the one person who will always challenges them is me. And that is the constant battle. Find your code cowboy!!
Work out!! There is something amazing about the endorphin rush of a workout. Aside from the confidence it gives, the can-do attitude it imbues me with, I actually ended up looking good and feeling great.
Read. Read. Read some more! If you’ve made it this far, Hurray! you are a reader. I’ve found that sinking your teeth into a novel is a terrible way to read. Better to cast your eyes upon it. Leave book eating to termites.
Be an Expert in something. I love the beauty of expertise; the ease that comes with being really good at something. Find that one thing and go hard.
Improvise, Adapt, Overcome. Life throws curveballs. She loves them. So do the Bear Grylls thing. Find your way out of that pit at all costs
Be yourself. Even when misunderstood. Especially then. You are a unique pancake. There are many pancakes out there, but there’s only one of you. Be proud of who you are.
Treat everyone fairly Everyone deserves a chance to be heard. Everyone is going through a story you’ll probably never understand. So be kind, be fair.
Laugh at Something, Preferably Yourself There’s always something to laugh at. Humour is a natural undercurrent endemic to the universe. Look and you’ll find it everywhere. And if it’s not there, there’s always yourself.
Choose yourself. I have found being selfish, every once in a while, is healthy. Sometimes you need to make yourself your top priority. Not always, just sometimes.
Smile. You have a beautiful smile. It’s not just the sun that should light up the world, you know.
Be there for your friends. It’s so easy to take friends for granted. I have failed at this sometimes and every once in a while I find the need to remedy it. All it takes is a call.
Not all tools need sharp edges. It’s easy to fall into the trap of perfectionism, young padawan. But sometimes, It’s okay to rip and tear instead of making incisions. And sometimes, it’s necessary to be the club rather than the bullet. What is up with all these violent analogies?
Keep a Journal Ahhhh, that’s the safe space. The one place I can be truthful and honest and fear no repercussions. A place where thoughts can find a home and every once in a while you can visit them — these previous versions of you scattered all over the pages.
Be kind to yourself Most importantly, be kind to yourself, hold yourself gently as you walk through life. You are your harshest critic and still your greatest cheerleader. So be nice to yourself.
And so I head forward into the future, on this paved road of time. My book lays unwritten, the road ahead hidden by the mist of future decision. I can only hope that the me of today is proud of who I will be tomorrow.
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